A senior citizen female who is a great great great grandmother said that spousal abuse must be met head on the first time it happens or it will become a regular act by the abuser.

The smile on her African American face turned to a very stern look when I mentioned that I had heard of women using Lye to cause chemical burns on men as a child. She replied that I never use Lye because it deformed him and I had to look at the deformation every day. 

This senior citizen woman could see I was baffled because it was clear she had been a small statured lady doing her young adulthood. I encouraged her to share her means of defense.

She shared that she used hot coffee grinds thrown against the male’s shoulder. This senior citizen continued that she did not have to look at the scar marks on his face. She then raised her arm as to hit at the wall behind her head so fast I was amazed.

This senior citizen lady confirmed my belief that when we reach the point of physical fighting it is time to go our separate ways. I can say that in 49 years I have never hit Gwynelle, so I never worried about chemical burns.

This great great great grand mother made it crystal clear that spousal abuse must be terminated on the first instant your spouse or significant tries it or you have a dysfunctional marriage on your hands.